As Scout Finch says in the infamous words penned by Harper Lee, "What in the sam hill are you doing, Walter?"
This was my thought this morning at 9:15 a.m. when I went to the "Carrefour", which is a French "hypermarché", or sort of like Target meets Walmart meets Hannaford's, or whatever enormous grocery store is the biggest one you can think of where you live. Today I thought "what in the sam hill is going on here?".
As a rule, I hate going to Carrefour. Selection? Yes, it's there, for the most part. Random American and English products at astronomical prices not to be found elsewhere in France? Yep, also there (example, I paid 8 dollars for the smallest jar of peanut butter that exists, like the size of a tennis ball).
But the reason I HATE going into Carrefour is the lines. There are literally 52 checkouts, and in general about two-thirds to three-quarters of them are open at any given time. But it doesn't matter, because there is always, always a line, express lane, whatever lane you choose. And the endless, endless aisles stretching over hundreds of square meters are always crammed with people and carts and strollers and trolleys and what have you. What's more, so many people work there that it is baffling to me. There are all kinds of Carrefour workers whizzing around on rollerskates, wearing headsets. It is all so very high-tech, and yet, in the end, it's Stalin-era breadlines.
There is a frenzy, and sort of panic on the faces of every customer in the store. I always tell Thomas it is like it is the apocalypse, the French are awaiting the end of the world, TODAY, right now, and they have to stock up on everything they possibly can RIGHT THIS SECOND and then get in THE LINE.
I attribute this to: lower prices than the other smaller grocery stores, much more space thus many more products and more variety: so when people want a lot of something, or a deal, or big ticket items, they go to Carrefour. Which is, like everything else in France, closed on Sunday.
This makes Saturday in the store borderline hilarious, for an American. I am often reminded of the film "It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World", or, Alan Arkin and Peter Faulk yelling "Serpentine! Serpentine!" in that 1979 American comedy classic "The In-laws". If you've seen either, you know EXACTLY what I'm taking about. It's a visual.But today was Friday, not Saturday. I went early, like the senior-citizens in the US, going for the early bird special. Why suffer? Because there were things I needed that can be found no place else: Brown sugar, Halloween balloons, peanut butter. These are the desperate situations that drive me into the Carrefour.
I walked in, and pandomonium. People everywhere, huge lines. I was confused. I hiked from one end of the store to the other, grabbing my precious items, and then bit the bullet and got in line. And lo and behold, what do I see all around me that people are buying? Books. One by one, in front of me, to the left, to the right, individuals are laying a thick paperback tome onto the running belts either all by itself or amidst other random things - a bottle of coke, several bars of chocolate, tea. toilet Paper.
I got up on my tiptoes to get a better look. There were 3 teenagers in front of me, babbling away, excitedly clutching their books so that I couldn't even see. And finally one of them gently handed it to the cashier for scanning.
Harry Potter, book 7, translated into French. Just released today in all stores across the country, not allowed by French law to open early, or at midnight (labor unions), thus at 9 am when the doors opened......
Poudlard (the French translated name for Hogwarts, Harry's school) and all its stories await the entire non-English-reading population today.
Interesting to note that a French teenager posted on the web his own translation into French back this summer after the original English version was released July 21st. It was immediately removed and he was promptly fined or thrown in jail or some such.
I eavesdropped on the 3 teenagers discussing whether or not Snape really did or didn't kill Dumbledore. I smiled and thought "oh boy, I could just lean over and spill the beans here!" But of course I didn't!
